Half of the divorcees look at divorce as an ending while the other half look at it as a fresh start. All of them know that moving forward starts by accepting that everything has already changed. You might have a hard time looking at divorce as a good thing right now. Still, focus on improving your situation as a way to reclaim your freedom. Start with these aspects of your life:
Your spouse is not the only family you have. While you are busy talking to divorce lawyers in Townsville about finalising the divorce and making sure you and your children will not be left with nothing, do not forget to reach out to your parents, siblings or any other relatives nearby. This kind of change should not be handled on your own. You need all the support you can get, and where better to turn than your own blood? Especially if the divorce is a painful one, you will need something empowering to help you move forward. Use this time to focus on yourself and mend broken relationships that made you feel like your spouse was all you had. Your children will also benefit from having family around. These are relatives they will not lose, and when parents go through a divorce, children need people who will be permanent in their life to show them that everything will work out.
You are encouraged to talk about divorce as a way to put this chapter of your life to rest, but you might not be ready for it to follow you at work. Some colleagues take it upon themselves to offer help even though you do not ask them to do so. This has the side effect of making you feel suffocated at work. You do not want everyone to look at you as that person who just got divorced. If it cannot be helped, perhaps it’s time to consider a career change. You are not running away. You are simply looking for a more peaceful environment where you can heal from your divorce and move forward without judging or patronising glances. You can also find it easier to connect with other divorced individuals during this time in your life.
You went through a divorce, but do not let this change your faith in love. You can find someone new, who will accept you and your past without using them against you. However, it is not right to rush into a new relationship as a way to heal. It is better to deal with your feelings by yourself and enter a new relationship once you’re ready. It will not be fair to the person if you are still hurt from your past relationship and they have to suffer because of it. All the pain you’re not addressing might be directed at this new relationship even if you’re not doing it consciously. You are hurt, but you do not have to hurt someone else as a way to feel good about yourself.
A divorce is enough to make your life complicated, but do not be afraid to move forward. Realise your current situation, accept it and heal.